Peace Partnership

Emotional Efficiency

Posted by on Oct 3, 2017

 

One of the biggest problems to plague my home is time management. I love being early. I like to sit in the back and observe from a distance. My wife and kids don’t mind showing up late for the majority of things on our schedule, and sometimes it’s even preferred. It gets better: they love to sit closer to the front. In fact, if it were up to my daughter, I think she’d be fashionably late to everything we attend and walk all the way to the front and plop down without a care in the world.

Problems like these plague almost every family. There are times I begin to get angry with my family members because I think they are doing it just to spite me! Most every Sunday morning on the way to church I have to remind myself that these scenarios are simply not worth getting angry at, and that I need to reserve my anger for true injustice. So when it comes to avoiding that angry outburst, I have to remind myself to be emotionally efficient.

I use the word efficient because I think my own desires for efficiency are what get me into this mess in the first place. I want to make the most of my time, and if I feel as though I’m not doing that, I begin to get upset. But what really needs to happen is a re-framing of this desire. It’s not a bad thing to be early, but if I allow it to damage my relationships with those I love then I’m still not being efficient. I might be on time, but I have lost emotional and psychological ground in some of my most important relationships, something that is not worth the cost of being on time to every church service.

I like being early to church. My family doesn’t share this value. What’s a guy to do? It took a little while to figure it out, but here’s my solution: I just leave. Not in an angry, I-hate-everyone, slamming the door behind me kind of way. But in a loving and gentle kind of way, telling everyone goodbye and that I will see them at church in a little while. It took my wife a little while to adjust to this boundary.

By re-framing my understanding of what it truly means to be efficient, I was able to adjust the expectations I had of my family. It just wasn’t worth the emotions I was putting into it. And it has truly been amazing that as I reserve my emotions for more important things, I can see where I’ve been able to approach truly degrading and inhumane injustice with a calm, dignified, and forthright anger. By utilizing our emotions in a more effective manner I am able to approach situations from a standpoint of understanding, rather than anger.


 

Grab your family, friends and co-workers and join us for Peace Partnership nights at the Kansas City Mavericks on December 16 and February 27. Tickets are $20 each and $7 of every ticket is a donation for Peace Partnership. Other fundraisers will also be happening throughout the hockey games. Our goal is to sell 200 tickets – watch for an event invite on Facebook and please share with your friends!


Thank You!

 

THANK YOU TO ALL OF OUR SPONSORS, GOLFERS, & VOLUNTEERS who helped make our first Peace Partnership Golf Classic at Adams Pointe Golf Club a huge success! 144 golfers, 26 sponsors, 49 in-kind and auction sponsors, and 12 volunteers joined us to HELP RAISE OVER $35,000 for Peace Partnership! These much needed funds will help provide quality, affordable mental health services to families and children in need in our community. Extra thanks go to all who were instrumental in helping plan our tournament – Shane Gardner, Terry Hyer, Nancy Pagel, Dale Rife, Craig Rookstool, Lorie Rookstool, and Dave Schwirtz, as well as our special guests for the day – Neil Smith, Foots Walker, Art Still and Willie Wilson. We are grateful to everyone for your support!!

If you read this list and want to find out how to become a Peace Partner don’t miss the chance to get involved. Please click on the link below to become a Partner. To host an event or take part in any of our upcoming activities, contact our Director of Development, Amy Henderson at 816-399-0530 or: amy@peacecounseling.org.

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